Celebrating A Trio of Fathers

This year, contrary to last year, and more years than I care to think about before that, I will actually get to spend Father's Day with my dad. In fact, all going to plan, nearly all the dads in my immediate family's life will be together and that has never happened before.

Expat life is like that - it means being apart for days you should be together.

Last year we (my sons, my husband and I) had a beautiful Father's Day and I sat thinking how great it would be if next year it could be spent with my dad and my father -in-law too. And then life carried on until a few months ago when suddenly the idea I had last year sprang to mind.

I sent an email to my stepmother, who booked flights quicker than you can say, "Happy Father's Day" and the date was etched in stone on the calendar. And that day is now here.

We have a fun afternoon planned. Three dads. Three grandsons. Three sons. One family. One celebration of fatherhood. We'll be making the most of a unique occasion.

I am so pleased that we get to spend this day together.

Wishing all you fathers out there a wonderful day in the company of your families.

Father's Day - From a Distance

One of the downsides about living overseas is days like today. It's a day I'd like to spend with my dad, take him out for lunch, see him opening a gift in person. Instead, we have to settle with presents through the post, a phone call and a thank you said over the miles. And that's the best case scenario.

It's not even like my brother can carry the baton for us both in my absence on Father's Day as he lives even further away.

So all in all, what I can do on Father's Day just doesn't seem enough. Not considering all that my father has done for me, the inspiration he has been, the motivating factor at so many important times in my life.

And when I stop and think about it, he's actually only got himself to blame for the fact that I am in the Netherlands and absent every Father's Day.

In 1999 he gave me an early Christmas present of a reconditioned computer so that I could complete the dissertation for my post-graduate degree. Instead I met my future husband online, who happened to be a Dutchman. And I never finished that dissertation....

That was certainly one of my father's most influential moves. Others were spurring me on to go to university, motivating me to get a good education under my belt. He was also responsible for me taking A-Level Economics. He wanted me to take A-Level Maths. After I finished laughing hysterically, we settled on a compromise of Economics so that I had something at least a little 'business' like. Looking back now it provided a good balance with the more creative A-Levels I took. He's always encouraged me to strive to do more than I thought I could.

He was by my side as I bought my first home. He helped me hang hung lights and pictures and candleholders on the walls in my new flat. When I announced I was contemplating moving to the Netherlands his response was "Carpe diem". He walked me down the aisle on my wedding day. He jumped on a plane to come see us just days after each of my three sons were born.

He's been a steadfast influence in my life and, despite the distance, has remained a father and revelled in his role as grandfather to my sons. He is a cornerstone in my little Dutch family - and all done from 560km away. He is the ultimate proof that it's not how far away you live from your family, but the effort you make to be a parent and grandparent that counts.

So, happy father's day Dad - thank you for all you do and all that you are in our lives. Hope your 'top up' lasts you past the summer....cheers!

And of course happy father's day to all those other fathers out there - including my children's very own super papa.

NoGuPoMo: Being A Bilingual Parent by Dad's The Way I Like It

I am delighted to be able to share a father's story here about raising a bilingual child in Wales. I'm delighted for two reasons: firstly it's nice to get a father's perspective and secondly my grandmother is Welsh, as is my father. I have lots of family living in Wales who speak Welsh so this is a particularly interesting post on a personal level too. Growing up my Dad used to try and add a few Welsh words to our vocabulary, always telling us to shut the door in Welsh (cau'r drws) and getting us to count to three (un, dou, tri,) which sounded like 'in the tree' to us......

And so with no further ado it's over to Jonathan of Dad's the way I like it.

Welsh School Text Book
Photo Credit: C Hargraves

"Learning any language can involve a fun journey and a few challenges along the way. With learning Welsh, minor milestones that stick out in my mind include things like the first time I left a voicemail message in Welsh, being brave enough to select ‘Cymraeg’ (Welsh) as the language to use on ATM machine and running a Welsh language football podcast for about a year.

I moved to Wales in 2007 and live in an area where the majority of the locals speak Welsh as their first language. I’ve learnt the language thanks to Welsh for Adults courses available at the university where I work and regularly use Welsh in my working life. However, it felt like I was starting off on a new journey once we decided to raise our son bilingually. Indeed, it has been an exciting journey for both myself and my wife that has brought with it some exciting challenges and opportunities.

When reading about bilingualism before our son’s birth, I was struck by the number of different ways in which children can be brought up bilingually and the different dynamics this can involve. Colin Baker’s book A Parent’s and Teacher’s Guide to Bilingualism was a real eye-opener and full of useful tips for a range of situations.

As I am from Scotland and my wife is from England, our decision to bring up our son in Welsh wasn’t motivated by a desire to pass on a culture and a language that had been a part of our own upbringing. What we wanted was for Welsh and English to be part of his upbringing so as he could be fluent in both the native languages of Wales and become aware of the importance of both within Welsh culture. As Welsh is the first language of the majority of people in our village and the local area, it seemed the logical thing to do.

For me, becoming a bilingual parent has helped to enrich my Welsh vocabulary with words and expressions that I hadn’t ever learnt in classes. Some friends kindly gave us a book entitled Magu’r Babi: Speaking Welsh with Children that features entire sections on topics such as ‘Codi gwynt’ (bring up wind), ‘Taflu i fyny’ (throwing up) and ‘Cosi traed’ (tickling feet). Thankfully we haven’t had to use phrases from the second of those three categories too frequently so far!

Bringing up our son in Welsh as well as English has also meant that both my wife and I have been trying to learn some Welsh nursery rhymes. There are some that we have come across that are basically just Welsh versions of popular English nursery rhymes such as ‘The Wheels on the Bus’ and ‘Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes’.

In some ways, I feel that singing Welsh versions of nursery rhymes that exist in English is almost cheating so I’m keen to learn some Welsh nursery rhymes that don’t seem to have English equivalents  such as ‘Dau gi bach’ (Two Small Dogs). I’ve already purchased two CDs of nursery rhymes in Welsh that I have been listening to in the car on the way to work. With it being quite at the moment and having to roll the windows down, I think I could easily end up embarrassing myself if I start singing along too loudly!

My wife has got a bit of  a head start on me with the nursery rhymes as she’s been going along to a ‘Cymraeg o’r Crud‘ (Welsh from the Cradle) course that is aimed at people who speak little Welsh themselves but want to be able to use it with their baby. It seems like fun too as the classes often involve arts and crafts as well.

These classes and indeed becoming a mum, have been a real spur for my wife to learn more Welsh. As

Welsh School Book
Photo Credit: C Hargraves

she hasn’t got to know as many Welsh speakers through work, she hasn’t had the same source of motivation as I’ve had. From the day of my staff induction at Bangor University, I learnt about the status and importance of the Welsh language and started learning Welsh within a matter of weeks.

For me, learning Welsh has provided all sorts of opportunities that I would have not had access to had I not decided to learn the language. For example, I have become interested in the local music scene and been able to follow a Welsh language drama series called Rownd a Rownd that is filmed in a village where I lived for three years. Almost two years ago, I also made an appearance on Welsh language television channel S4C in a comedy sketch show where I had to speak French to a plastic pigeon.

I hope that my son and indeed my wife will discover all sorts of fun and exciting opportunities through learning Welsh just as I have. In a few weeks time, we will all be going to the Eisteddfod Genedlaethol (a week long annual Welsh speaking cultural festival). To mark the occasion, I’ll be doing a bilingual (Welsh and English) blog post about this and my initial experiences of speaking Welsh to our son."

This post is republished with kind permission from Dad's the way I like it. You can connect with Dad's the way I like it on his Facebook page or on Google+.