tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post2943824634928866361..comments2024-01-26T02:50:31.892+01:00Comments on Turning Dutch: What Picture do we Paint of Ourselves Living Life in a Second Language?Amanda van Mulligenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17328016562973171711noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-74412439388402946212014-04-18T17:34:05.354+02:002014-04-18T17:34:05.354+02:00Very wise words, Ilja DeYoung. I will remember you...Very wise words, Ilja DeYoung. I will remember your comments when I'm struggling!!Hayleyhttps://bitterballenbruid.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-80594163729202889682014-04-18T12:48:24.239+02:002014-04-18T12:48:24.239+02:00I suspect being 40+ when I moved here didn't h...I suspect being 40+ when I moved here didn't help. Unlike a 20-something, I've been "me" for a lot longer. I had to take more steps backwards than someone who is new to his or her career or is still searching for his or her path in life.<br /><br />Being older (especially with no little kids) also limits my social interactions, especially since I was made redundant and can't get a foot back in the workplace. "Peers" are hard to find as they have their life-long friends and kids and grandkids and parents and coworkers to keep them busy, and probably haven't used English for a long time, unlike younger people. <br /><br />Beyond asking for "tasjes" and the occasional "goedemorgen" and "bedankt", I rarely use what baby Dutch I have. "Passive Dutch" like reading newspapers or watching TV is no replacement really.<br /><br />After 10 years here, few Dutch people know me at all except as somebody's wife. "Me" has become the person who has learned to enjoy solitary activities just to keep sane and potentially (hopefully) employable.<br /><br />I'm less depressed by this than it sounds, that being said! I've stopped beating myself up because I can't be like everybody else and I'm more at peace with myself. A sense of humour and supportive spouse helps!Canucky Womanhttp://www.canuckywoman.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-24278831720739009942014-04-11T22:43:05.760+02:002014-04-11T22:43:05.760+02:00I agree with Ilja DeYoung. It will take more time....I agree with Ilja DeYoung. It will take more time. But it will happen. English will always be your native language. But living in NL with a Dutch husband and kids in the Dutch education system moments will come when you find you can express something in Dutch but really wonder, 'how do you say that in English?'<br /><br />If you want to speed it up, read more Dutch (a daily paper), listen to Nederland 1, maybe even watch Dutch TV. (Oops. Three small children, no time for all of that, I know.)andrewb47https://www.flickr.com/photos/andrewb47/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-44835985017661872292014-04-11T20:55:08.118+02:002014-04-11T20:55:08.118+02:00This is something I found an answer to: I'm my...This is something I found an answer to: I'm my real self with people I share with all the languages I know and I can just switch from one to the other without trying to make them understand what I mean in any of the other languages. I only have 2 people I can do this: it's my sister and my husband ;-) <br />But when I have to talk only one at the time, I adapt my language, the register etc. to the context and yes, I feel like there is a part of me that can't really "get out", but that's not a problem. When we are in a meeting we don't just talk about our family or our feelings (unless that's the topic of the meeting). And the same way we choose the right language etc. when we talk to different people. My friends say though that I talk differently and act differently depending on the language I talk, but that is due to the different context every language requires (low context, high context) and the body language (when I talk Italian for example, or when I talk another language with my Italian friends, I know I can use some body language: they'll understand). <br />And I agree with Ilja DeYong: when our heart speaks the language, when it comes very naturally, we find the right words. We'll not think about what to say because words will just flow. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03443317639082231130noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-46729169849556871802014-04-11T17:11:57.038+02:002014-04-11T17:11:57.038+02:00Take heart my friend, there will be a day when you...Take heart my friend, there will be a day when you realise that Dutch word does discribe exactly what you feel. There will be a day when not only can you say something is green, but you can say it is light green with a blueish shine to it. <br />One day your heart will be able to speak Dutch as well. There will be English words that creep in (they do in my Dutch and I am born and bred here) but nobody will mind.<br /><br />There will always be people who look beyond the language and look at you. They will take time to listen to YOU (not your language). It won't be everyone (and it may not be the one you would most want to) but these people will listen you into confidence you need to learn even more Dutch.<br /><br />I admire everyone who makes the effort to speak our difficult language. I know it is hard work (having learned 2 other heart languages I know it is very hard work). <br /><br />Just remember:<br />Op een dag spreekt je hart ook Nederlands<br />Ilja DeYounghttp://www.notjustthelastchapter.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6798372697599428727.post-30818401984257454922014-04-11T08:56:08.785+02:002014-04-11T08:56:08.785+02:00Thanks for this post. It is something that I think...Thanks for this post. It is something that I think a lot about, especially in circumstances where the only language is Dutch. Sometimes I hate that I don't come across intelligent or competent and that I sound like a 4-year old and other times I try to remember it is good to feel that way because there are a lot of people struggling to be professional and competent in English. And since English is my native language I am often at a huge advantage. It gives me empathy I suppose because now I don't judge others as fast.<br /><br />I also think we will always be a little different in another language. Language is so heavily contextualized in culture that the ways of expression will always be different. As a teenager I was very fluent in Spanish and in a way I was a different person in that language because the culture of the language was so different. You understand what I mean?<br /><br />Okay, sorry this was little longer than I intended!Katherine @naturallyglobal.comhttp://naturallyglobal.comnoreply@blogger.com